I’ll be honest, it has taken me 33 years to feel like I’ve finally found my personal style. And even now, I wouldn’t say I open my closet every morning and instantly know exactly what I want to wear. Fashion for me has never been just about necessity. It’s about how an outfit makes me feel during the day. It’s about confidence, energy, and mood. But reaching this point has taken time, experimentation, and a lot of self-reflection. And there are so many little things that go into an outfit. You need to consider what you are doing that day, how much walking you’ll do, the weather, whether you need to move freely, if you’ll be eating something messy, or if you just want to feel elevated and polished. All of these details matter.

Understanding Which Items You Intuitively Go For

One of the first big things I learned is to understand what pieces I naturally gravitate toward. Over the years, I noticed certain items in my closet that I reach for repeatedly without even thinking. High-waisted pants, wide-leg denim, oversized t-shirts (or fitted tank tops), and the occasional blazers are some of my go-tos. These are the pieces that make me feel like myself, and slowly I built around them. Inspiration helps, of course, and I get a lot from Instagram and Pinterest, but I always remind myself to filter it through my own body type and my personal lifestyle.

Body Type & Posture

It doesn’t help to emulate someone who has a completely different shape or height than you. Understanding your body and falling in love with it again is the foundation of dressing well. Accepting the areas you might have struggled with in the past and finding ways to dress in a way that celebrates your body rather than hiding it has completely shifted my confidence.

Posture is another major game changer. For years, I tried to make myself appear smaller, to shrink into the background, because I am tall and I never wanted all eyes on me. Now I’ve learned to stand tall, to carry myself with confidence, and it completely transforms how outfits look on me. Clothes are not just about covering your body—they are about how you inhabit them. Fit is crucial, so take the time to explore what proportions work for you, what you want to highlight, and what you prefer to downplay. The fit should make you feel comfortable and confident at the same time.

Colours, Textures & Fabric

Colours also play a huge role in expressing yourself. I spent years wearing mainly black, white, beige, and denim because it felt safe. Those are timeless choices, but your outfit can also be a way to express your mood, your energy, or even a message you want to send out. Mostly I follow the rule of not mixing more than 3 colours in one outfit – you can’t go wrong with this rule of thumb. Fabric and texture are also important to consider. There is a difference between denim, silk, linen, wool, or other textiles. Thicker, stiffer materials can hold their shape and create a structured look, while softer or flowy fabrics give a more relaxed, cozy vibe. Think about how these fabrics work with your body, your comfort, and your daily activities. If you tend to sweat easily, some fabrics might not be practical, and transparency is another consideration. The right fabric can elevate your outfit while also making you feel confident and comfortable throughout the day.

But like – What’s the Vibe?

Another thing I’ve learned is to decide on the vibe you want to convey before getting dressed. Boxy, minimalistic, and straight-cut pieces can feel professional and polished, while soft, flowy blouses with ruffles or floral prints emphasize femininity and approachability. Form, color, and details, plus fabric, together set your mood and the impression you give. And there’s also a super practical way to dress if you just want to feel casual but still put together. You can opt for an oversized t-shirt, some denim, sneakers, and then elevate it with a cute handbag, some jewelry, and a little thought about your hair. Even the simplest combinations can look intentional when you think about fit, proportions, and little styling details.

I personally love “wide on wide,” like a wide, oversized shirt paired with wide-leg pants. Sometimes I just throw it on, but if I want a slightly more feminine silhouette, I’ll tuck the shirt in or swap for a fitted tank top. One thing I avoid is having something tight on top and tight on bottom—it can feel restrictive and take away from comfort, even makes me feel self-conscious. The most important thing is to feel good in your skin and move freely without overthinking how it might look from the outside. Even a basic outfit like denim pants and a t-shirt can be elevated with thoughtful touches: the way you tuck in the shirt, the fit of the pieces, the colours, whether your sneakers are clean, or adding jewelry that complements the look. Caring about these details, even just a little, can completely transform a simple outfit into something that feels intentional, polished, and you.

Embracing Multiple Versions of Yourself

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is that you are not one version of yourself. Some days I feel like a business vibe with a blazer and kitten heels. Other days I am the casual Pilates girl, wearing leggings and oversized shirts, or even an oversized hoodie with wide-leg pants paired with sneakers and gold jewelry. There’s also the side of me that likes to dress a little more feminine or sexy, accentuating certain features with fitted or tailored pieces. Accepting that you are different people on different days and that your style can shift with your mood is liberating. You don’t have to force yourself into one specific style all day every day.

Your Clothes Are Not The Full Outfit

Shoes, bags, jackets, scarves, and jewelry are part of the outfit too, you know? For me, a little thought goes a long way. Matching your handbag, shoes, and jacket is a small trick that can make even a basic outfit look polished and intentional. This applies even to casual looks. It’s honestly the easiest way to look put together without putting too much thought in it.

Finally, once you’ve explored all of this, it helps to know your current go-to pieces, based on the season you’re in. For me right now, they are wide-leg denim pants, an oversized t-shirt, a blazer, a fitted tank top, a jacket with more of a boxy fit, a cozy oversized hoodie and either sneakers or boots with a little heel. These items are my foundation, and I can mix and match them depending on my mood, the vibe I want to convey, the fit, the color, and the fabric. This is how I approach personal style in a way that feels authentic, confident, and flexible. You don’t need to follow trends or anyone else’s rules. Start with yourself, your body, and your mood, and let the outfit work for you rather than the other way around.

Checklist for Finding Your Personal Style

• Observe which pieces you naturally gravitate toward and build your wardrobe around them
• Know your body type and celebrate it. Consider posture and fit as part of your outfit
• Pay attention to colors, fabrics, and textures that make you feel good
• Decide on the vibe you want to convey before getting dressed. Professional, feminine, casual, playful?
• Use accessories like shoes, bags, and jewelry to elevate your outfit
• Remember you can be different versions of yourself on different days—your style doesn’t have to be the same 24/7
• Prioritise comfort and practicality without sacrificing your personal expression
• Mix and match your go-to pieces to create outfits that feel intentional and authentic

Fashion is a journey, not a destination, and it can take years to figure out what truly works for you. For me, it took 33 years, and I still learn new things every day. The most important lesson is to embrace yourself, pay attention to the details that make you feel confident, and don’t be afraid to play, experiment, and evolve. Your personal style is there to support you, elevate your confidence, and reflect the multiple sides of who you are.